Tuesday, June 30, 2009

"Hairy" situations on the farm

Day after storm #2, and I’m retracking my steps to figure out what sort of karma manure I’ve stepped in!
My family has been the victim of two hair catastrophes in less than two weeks!
INCIDENT #1 — This past Monday I threw caution to the wind and said “Yes” to the gum my big-eyed, lip-pouting older children begged for.
BIG MISTAKE! Even after my one-minute discussion about the dos and don’ts of gum-chewing, Rylan soon came running into the kitchen, “M-O-M!!!”
Before I even turned around I knew.
So, I took a breath, said a little prayer that the sticky, hard-to-next-to-impossible to get out substance was in a male child’s hair.
And, thankfully, it was!
But Rylan does EVERYTHING he can in the most meticulous fashion and putting gum in his hair was no different.
It was like the child rolled the gum into a play-dough-like log, set it on top of his head, did a head stand and then rubbed his head into the carpet!
The gum was not in his hair, it was super-glued onto his scalp and strapped down with hair!
Wanda said, “Peanut butter and ice.” Nope, didn’t work. So, I told Rylan, go to the back porch, “I’m gonna cut it out!”
He cried the whole way. After the buzzer got stuck in the peanut butter mess, I went for back up — my trusty hair-cutting scissors.
Now my precious 3-year-old has a lightning bolt-type bald spot on the top of his already shaved down head! Phew!
INCIDENT #2 — (Some background info: I cut my family’s hair. And not just because I’m cheap; I really like to cut hair.)
So, it’s no surprise that my eldest daughter might be interested in my pastime, after watching me cut her dad’s hair and her siblings’, as well as her own.
And I will tell you that I’m VERY careful with my children and scissors — really, only the older two have ever held a pair of skin-puncturing, hair-cutting blades. But consciously I know children will disobey — innocently or not.
So why I was surprised when I got that phone call at work that Tuesday with the horrible news, I don’t know.
Time stood still as I listened to Matt tell me how Kadence had chopped three inches off the left side of my baby Bella’s hair and created a slab of one-inch bangs across her forehead (or, more appropriately, scalp!) I had to take MANY deep breaths before I drove home to see the damage.
One look and I knew we needed professional help. An emergency trip to see Chelsie with my unfriendliest child did not sound like a fun afternoon, but I sacrificed.
I realize now all is well.
Probably by week’s end I won’t see my son’s “bald” spot and the shock of Bella’s VERY short hair has worn off.
The sun will rise just the same on my house with less hair than it did with more.
Hair disasters have become all too common in my house these days. Soon there won’t be enough kid hair left to cut off, even out, etc.
I better not be next!

As seen in the Lawrence County Record

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